The Veg Blog

Yesterday was the annual Poplar Spring Animal Sanctuary open house. It’s one of four major events Poplar Spring has each year. The first is the 5k run and walk. The second is the Montgomery County Farm Tour, which is similar to the open house except that most of the people that come to the Farm Tour aren’t vegans and may not even have a clue what an animal sanctuary is. While that event offers a lot of opportunity for outreach, it can be frustrating to hear yet another idiot make a joke about bacon when visiting the pig yard. The third event, the open house, is one where a lot of the farm’s supporters and those curious about what Poplar Spring does come out to visit with the animals, eat catered food, and hear a speaker (this year, Jonathan Balcombe, who, I should note, isn’t afraid to get down and dirty cleaning up in the pig yard, either). The fourth event, Thanksgiving With the Turkeys, is probably my favorite, but I’ve talked about that one before.

Yesterday’s open house went really well. It was very well attended this year and seemed to bring in a fair amount of money for the farm. As usual, my job was that of a “floater,” going from animal spot to animal spot to help out where needed. Some of the day’s highlights included meeting one of the guys responsible for bringing the initial batch of 140 pigs to Poplar Spring 12 years ago, watching Rocky the goat charm every single visitor that walked through the gate, and getting to see Rasine hold Alina:

(Rasine also pet some pigs yesterday, which was a big step for her. She’d been a little tentative on previous visits.)

While I still stumble sometimes with questions that people ask when I’m manning the animal areas (ie. “Shoot! Why do roosters have the comb and waddle? I forget!”), I’m not too bad at remembering animal names and stories and key facts about lifespan, diet, etc. But yesterday, I was completely flummoxed by one little girl who was maybe ten or 11 years old. She came up to me when I was in the goat pasture and started a conversation.

“Are these goats in captivity for their whole lives?”

“Um… you mean here?” I responded.

“Yeah.”

“Well, they have full roam of this pasture and the rest of the farm when the gates are opened up,” I told her.

“But this farm has a fence around it so they can’t get into the woods.”

…

“So you’re keeping them here so they can’t get into the woods and run free.”

…

I think I sputtered off some response about how sometimes the animals come in sick and need food and medication so the farm makes sure they’re well cared for. Who knows if she was convinced. The look she was giving me seemed to indicate she was enjoying holding my feet to the fire.

I told Sandy, the farm manager, about this exchange. “I’m glad I didn’t have to answer that question,” he told me.

Every time I leave one of the farm’s events, I make a mental note of the questions I didn’t have answers to so I can find out for next time. Clearly, this question is one I’ll have to give a little more thought so that I’m not taken down a notch by a tween again.

31-year-old Myq Kaplan finished in the top 5 of the latest season of Last Comic Standing. Kaplan has appeared on The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien and had a Comedy Central Presents special. And get this: he makes jokes about vegans that are actually funny. Could be because he’s a vegan himself.

Myq took some time to chat with me about veganism, comedy, and food. And I tried my best not to be funnier than him. I think I succeeded.

What’s your vegan story?

In high school, I remember thinking it might not be necessary or desirable to eat animals, but decided they were too delicious to think about it further. In college, I thought about it and decided to give it a shot, to have my behavior match up with my thinking, and it worked out. Then a couple years after college, I decided to fully align ethics with what I believed, I should give veganism a shot, and that worked also. For me, it’s just about the factory farms and unnecessary horrible conditions that the meat industry raises animals in, for meat and dairy and eggs–I’m a fan of the concept of farms that treat animals nicely, free-range, organic, local, cage-free, etc., if people don’t think they can make the full transition to not eating any animal products (or just cutting back the amount of meat and dairy they eat, because it doesn’t need to be an all or nothing thing necessarily), but for me, it’s been working out so far.

With every joke targeted at vegans being some lame variation of “PETA means People Eating Tasty Animals! HAR!”, it took a vegan to say something actually funny about being vegan (seriously, “I don’t care about the environment… I eat the environment” was a brilliant line). How have crowds responded to your bits about veganism? Has comedy-as-activism had a noticeable effect?

I don’t know that my jokes have necessarily made people change their minds about eating meat or dairy, but hopefully I’ve at least been able to let people know that vegans and vegetarians aren’t all humorless, patronizing jerks. (Humor-FULL, patronizing jerks, maybe.) Crowds respond to jokes that are funny, and that’s what I aim for in my comedy. I think most people feel like vegetarians and vegans are judging them for eating wrong or living incorrectly, which might make them less open to hearing what they might view as reasonable or legitimate arguments for the lifestyle, and more likely to ridicule it for being different, which I think is a very natural and human thing to do. I try to tap into what people perceive, and come at the issue from a non-threatening, non-judgmental place, finding what’s funny about the concepts from both sides. My aim is just to make good jokes, and hopefully people of all diets can appreciate that. (And if it makes people think on top of that, then great.)

Last Comic Standing has changed a lot from season to season (they used to have the comics live together, they used to do “challenges,” they’ve turned the finale into a show with five people, etc.). What surprised you about the Last Comic Standing process as someone in the thick of it?

I don’t know that much was surprising about it to me. Surprise! As far as what fans might be surprised to learn, I imagine some fans know more than others. Some people think it’s just like American Idol, where people who have never done comedy line up to see who is the fresh new face of comedy, when in fact, standup takes years of doing to get good, in general, unlike singing where someone COULD be great after only singing in their basement for years. I don’t know if that’s surprising to anyone, but if it is, surprise!

The judges on Last Comic Standing were a lot less annoying than on “American Idol.” They weren’t there to cut people down, but to offer some actual advice and point out what worked in each person’s set. They seemed like they probably hung out backstage and talked with you guys as peers versus judges on something like American Idol where you can picture the judges whisked away in their respective limos, far far away from the contestants. True?

Oh, that was all an act. They may have played nice for the cameras, but in real life, our judges were whisked away plenty, in four limos per judge (one for each of their limbs, so you might call them “limb-ousines,” but not limb-os, because that’s a silly game and this is as serious as not getting into heaven) to castles atop a cloud with a moat made of lava full of sharks made of piranhas (in 3D, coming to you this August, or last August, depending when you’re reading this), no expense spared on the dimensionality of the piranha-sharks.

Sincerely, each judge had their own dressing room but certainly they did interact with us like human beings, colleagues in the business of comedy. They are all really great comedians and down-to-earth people, so the answer to your question seems like “yes.” True!

PS I know nothing of the American Idol judge situation, but my acceptance of your assessment thereof is not legally binding.

There seemed to be a period there in the late 90s where stand-up comedy lost the mainstream appeal it had earlier in the decade. What brought it back?

I’m not sure. I imagine the Internet had something to do with it. Also comedians being good and people finding out about it (maybe through the Internet? but also real life?). Uh-oh, a question I don’t know the answer to! I hope that’s all right. I mean, I’m not sure that I would say comedy today DOES have “mainstream appeal.” There are still plenty of people who have never been to a comedy show, compared to almost no one who has never been to, say, a movie. Or a concert. Stand-up doesn’t have the respect that the visual arts get, I’d say; even if people don’t go to museums that much, they probably PRETEND to go to them more often than they go to comedy shows. But there certainly HAS been a resurgence in comedy in the past decade, with at least some subset of the population caring about it, and I honestly don’t know what all the reasons are. I’m just happy it’s happening, because I started doing it in the early 2000s, so I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m selfish and appreciative to the forces of the universe. (To answer a question you didn’t ask.)

What’s next?

I just put out a CD a few months ago called Vegan Mind Meld. It’s available on Itunes, Amazon, and at www.myqkaplan.com (which is my website–you can tell, because it’s my name). I’ll also be on tour with the rest of the top 5 finalists from Last Comic Standing, for the next several months. And hopefully I’ll be on your TV some more as well.

I know you probably hate this question, but I feel I have to ask… “Vegan Mind Meld”… what inspired that title?

I do not hate that question. I’m not a big fan of hatred. (I don’t hate it, though.)

The title came from a joke that I have, and I like it because it represents a lot of what I and my comedy are about–sci-fi dorkery, my dietary lifestyle, words, connecting with people, thinking, etc. You know, hilarious stuff.

PS. What inspired this interview question?

Favorite meal (either made yourself or at a restaurant)?

I like a lot of things. One of my favorite restaurants in NYC is a place called Blossom, and I like pretty much everything I’ve had there. I’m also a huge fan of peanut butter. And other things.

(Below is a video of Myq’s performance on The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien. There’s some not-appropriate-for-younger-kids stuff in there, just so you know.)

In my ongoing attempt to review stuff that was sent to me a long time ago and should have been reviewed back then, I thought I’d write up a few notes on a couple of bars that were sent to me earlier in the year to try.

First up is the PranaBar, one of the many new raw energy bars on the market. All ingredients in PranaBars are raw except for the nuts and seeds, “which require slow cooking to denature enzyme inhibitors they contain.” The bars are vegan, GMO-free, soy-free, gluten-free, and contain no added sugar. The result? Probably the tastiest energy bar on the shelves. They sent along Mango Maca and Raspberry Pomegranate bars for me to try and they were both absolutely delicious. They didn’t taste “health foody,” which I think would make these a great choice for kids or people who generally shy away from anything that doesn’t contain HFCS. The bars are a bit pricey, retailing at about two bucks a pop, but hey… not everything should cost less than a dollar. (Note that this company does produce non-vegan bars under their “Boomi Bar” line that contain whey and honey. Stick with the Prana and Prana SuperCharger bars.)

Next up is the Bora Bora bar from Bora Bora Foods. Bora Bora is a small company focused on organic, gluten-free, non-GMO bars without preservatives, artificial sweeteners, etc. Not all bars are vegan (some have honey), but most are. These will appeal to the fans of straight-ahead fruit-and-nut bars. They’re simple, they’re tasty, and they’ll make you happy. Bora Bora sent along a couple of the vegan bars for me to try and they were quite good, with just enough of a twist on traditional nut bars to be interesting (like the Tropical Sesame Cranberry or Tiki Blueberry Flax bar). The Bora Bora bars were kind of hard to come by when they first sent the product along for review, but since then they’ve developed a pretty solid distribution and have gotten much easier to find. Good stuff.

Over the weekend, Stephanie over at Animal Rights and AntiOppression shared a video (embedded at the end of this post), which comes courtesy of the Tribe of Heart folks. In the video, James LaVeck discusses an event held by the Ohioans for Humane Farming, a “coalition of animal welfare, family farming, food safety, and environmental advocates advocating for more humane standards to prevent cruel factory farming practices in Ohio.” The fundraising event was promoted heavily as having “delicious food” and namechecked famous chefs involved. “Hey,” you might think, “I bet they were serving up some great vegan food!”

You’d be wrong.

In actuality, the event featured “grass-fed cheeseburgers with cheddar,” goat crostini, chicken confit, goat with pesto, and meatballs made of lambs. This, apparently, is the HSUS’s idea of “delicious food.”

LaVeck then points us to the Ohio group’s about page, which lists other members of the coalition, including several local humane societies, sanctuaries, and animal welfare groups alongside the Great American Lamb Company, cattle ranchers, and other farmers and organizations whose livelihoods depend on killing animals.

Listen. Enough is enough. Let’s cut the crap and get to the point: we don’t need national organizations that supposedly exist to help animals a.) forming coalitions with people who directly benefit from killing animals and b.) serving and promoting meat at their fund-raising events. I’m tired of hearing about incremental reform. I’m tired of hearing about reaching out to the family farmer. I’m tired of hearing about different approaches aiming for the same result. I’m not interested (and I don’t think the animals are, either) in approaches that actively promote the consumption of meat and other animal products.

The HSUS has some explaining to do. And if I were any of the animal organizations listed as part of the coalition, I’d be embarrassed and working to get my group’s name removed from that page pronto. All the good work that they do could get quickly tarnished by a coalition like this.

Keep in mind I’m not criticizing every person in these organizations. I know and have met dozens of people in HSUS, COK, Farm Sanctuiary, etc. and most are good people with good intentions. But when HSUS pulls something like this, they–as an organization–have to be held accountable. We need to call them out. We need to criticize tactics (without making it personal) and get an honest discussion happening. You don’t get people to stop eating meat by encouraging them to eat meat. (But you may get people eating meat again, churning out another one of those annoying vocal ex-vegans.)

Stephanie sums it up nicely (emphasis added):

Please, let’s hold each other accountable, even when that’s difficult to do (and yes, even when we know there are good, well-intentioned individuals inside groups). Please, let’s firmly stand together to say that this is not okay. Please, let’s change course. Please, let’s stop making excuses for what is inexcusable. Please, animal rights advocates, let’s fight for what we actually believe and stop supporting groups and campaigns that are less than honest, that do not reflect what we know to be right and just, and that give credibility and the “humane” label to the exploitation and killing of animals. Let’s show more loyalty to the nonhuman animals than to the groups that keep selling them out.

From “Q&A Experts and Studies: Not Always Trustworthy,” an interview in Time with David Freedman, author of Wrong, a book which focuses on how wrong “experts” and “studies” usually are:

What about studies that involve animal testing and take what they study on animals and apply it to humans? Is that really an effective way to determine what we should eat or what cancer treatments will work?

There are some things we just can’t study on humans because it would be incredibly unethical. Of course, it’s a much debated question of whether it’s ethical to study on animals too, but putting that question aside, clearly it can really help science move forward to do animal research. However, the fact of the matter is, the majority of animal research does not translate well to human beings, and in spite of the fact that scientists love to point out that we share anywhere from 90% to 99% of our genes with different types of mammals, we know we’re really different than mice and we’re even really different than apes. Again and again and again we see that drugs and behavior and almost anything you want to look at in animals turns out to not apply well to human beings. So, yes, it advances basic science to ask these questions, but does it result in good advice for us? In general, the answer is no.

Two weeks ago, the coolest place opened up just outside of Las Vegas in Henderson, NV: Atomic #7 Trustworthy Treats. They’re an ice cream parlor that serves huge variety of vegan ice cream (and dairy, too, but they keep everything nice and separate… honestly, the dairy feels like an afterthought with all the attention given to the vegan side of things). But get this: it’s all made to order from scratch. You pick the flavor, the type of milk–including rice, soy, coconut, and almond–and “chunky elements.” And if you want it, a homemade vegan waffle cone.

But wait until you see the video (I shot this last tonight):

How freakin’ cool is that? Add the fact that a local vegan baker was handing out samples of cake and that’s a hard place to beat.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some mint chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream waiting to be devoured.

We lost our sweet girl today.

We will miss you so, so much, Amina. Thank you for picking us and sharing your life with us.

Taken in February of this year.

October 2009. This one is one of my favorites.

At Barktoberfest (an annual reunion/fundraiser for the shelter where we adopted Amina), October 2009.

November 2008. Thanks to Natala Constantine for this great shot.

When we first met Amina at FOHA, May 1, 2005.

This Sunday I’m running the 7th annual Poplar Spring Run for the Animals 5k. It’s also my own seventh time I’ve run the race — the first one was just a couple of months after I started volunteering at the farm back in 2004.

As I did last year, this year I’m raising money through sponsorships. I hope that you’ll consider sponsoring me and supporting the farm for whatever you can afford using this big ol’ donate button:

This year I’m running in honor of two animals, both of whom are very close to my heart, reminding me often why I’m vegan and why I will never stop working toward educating others about animal rights.

First up is Amina. We adopted Amina, a bluetick coonhound, five years ago from Friends of Homeless Animals, a nearby no-kill shelter. She’d been found wandering in southwest Virginia seven months previous. She was probably a hunting dog (she has a small buckshot still under her skin on one of her hind legs) and was likely bred, as she has had a litter of puppies. After being picked up, Amina was taken to a shelter, and her time was almost up before a woman adopted her with the intention of finding a new home for her. After bouncing between foster homes and changing names a number of times, she wound up at FOHA, where we met her and instantly fell in love. After our first meeting with her, my wife and I talked it over and went to see her in her kennel run. We asked her through the cage door if she wanted to come home with us and she pawed at the door as if to say, “Of course!”

It’s been a great five years with Amina and all her goofy quirks. For a coonhound, she’s an unsually quiet dog, only barking four or five times in the entire time she’s been with us. She’s had a rough year this year, being diagnosed with very severe inflammatory bowel disease. She’s been on a steady dose of medications for the last month and as a side effect, her leg muscles have weakened quite a bit. It’s been touch-and-go trying to get her on the road to recovery fighting this severe intestinal disease and though she’s far from herself, we’re still hoping that she’ll recover and start to reverse some of these side effects that have set in. We love the girl deeply and have struggled watching her in various stages of discomfort during the onset of IBD (which took well over a year for the vets to successfully diagnose) and during the heavy medication that’s followed. Hopefully on Sunday she’ll be feeling good enough to join us at the race to meet some of the other dogs.

Secondly is Juniper, who I ran in honor of last year. I won’t recall Juniper’s entire story (read up in Poplar Spring’s newsletter or in Deb’s great post from last year), but in short: her family had to leave their farm and when they did, they simply left her behind. Juniper survived difficult weather on her own with only grass to eat for nine months before the neighbors finally called somebody about her. She’d developed a bad infection in her legs that forced her to walk on her front knees. Amazingly, when she came to the farm, she survived and showed quite an improvement in her health. Though she was never able to fully stretch her front legs out again because the muscles had atrophied, she was able to walk on them and loved her relaxed life at the farm.

She’s now 15 years old, making her the oldest goat or sheep ever at Poplar Spring, from what Terry tells me. She’s struggling with arthritis, but is still loving her treats and surprising everyone at the farm with her strength and amazing will to live.

Amina and Juniper are living reminders of how animals in dire straits can recover and live full lives. They’re perfect examples of distinct personalities that go against what everyone expects for their breed or species (have you ever heard of a silent coonhound? Or a goat that’s picky about food and won’t drink water if you’re looking at her?). They’re reminders that animals don’t exist for our use or taste. Let’s respect them and their lives.

Thanks for supporting Poplar Spring and the essential work they do.

A dairy farm in Canada is tweeting for their cows.

The 12 cows are part of the “Teat Tweet” project, tweeting “about their lactation cycle and robotic milking activities.”

I say this is a good opportunity for some activism. I dropped a note to Freeride Speedy:

@FreerideSpeedy It must suck to keep giving birth and then having your babies and milk stolen. Don’t worry: some of us out here respect you.

How about we all adopt one of the dairy cows and tweet words of encouragement? Here are direct links to their twitter accounts. And let’s use the hashtag #dairysucks.

• Attention Please
• Charge Cindy
• Charge Gina
• Charge Mabel
• Contrast Amanda
• Freeride Speedy
• Frosty Lace
• Goldwyn Windy
• Jerry J Lo
• Kurt Appeal
• Montgomery Mae
• Morty Fy