Comments on: On Kids

By: lauren

lauren — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 20:54:07 +0000

wonderful! :)

By: Click Clack Gorilla

Click Clack Gorilla — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 11:27:05 +0000

Three cheers to you for teaching your child these things so early. Why should we lie to kids about what goes on in the world? The saddest thing, I think, is not that a young child has already been informed about the sad things happening to animals, but that there are so many things happening in the world that are so terrible that the thought of telling our children about them scares us. So one more time hurray to you for going with the harder truth rather than the easy avoidance.

By: Green Experience

Green Experience — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 01:17:26 +0000

I’m not a vegan, but I do agree with their views about not having children. It’s actually quite bad for the environment, especially if you live in the United States.

By: MariaRose

MariaRose — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 17:36:49 +0000

I was recently introduced to this controversy and was pretty surprised by the strong feelings on both sides of the argument(s). I am not a parent myself, but it is well within the realm of possibility that I may parent a vegan child at some point. My general feelings about having kids is to make intelligent choices, but I would never have the audacity to tell someone that they should or should not have children. For many people they feel as strongly compelled to parent as they are compelled to live a vegan lifestyle. We can express our sentiments, but many vegans often forget that they are not the judges of the world.

By: liberrian vegan mom

liberrian vegan mom — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 22:26:39 +0000

Read Henrietta and the Golden Eggs to her. My daughter loves it!

By: Bea Elliott

Bea Elliott — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 02:08:16 +0000

What a great topic. I agree that parenthood isn’t for everyone – (all the time) – The decision to remain child-free has it’s ambivalent moments as well. At least for me, that’s how it is. I made the surgical decision more than 3 decades ago. In that time I’ve occasionally reflected the “what ifs” as a matter of “life passages”. I’ll never intimately know the joys of parenting, the “Kodak moments” – the miracle of birth… the wonderful smell kids have when they get out of the tub… the way they really “see” the world… There are many undeniably affecting experiences my choice has preventing me from having.

However, I don’t know that I would have found my way to veganism had I had children. I’ve managed to stay “untraditional” and have had the “luxury” of time. Also being a “dink” for decades, I’ve managed to retire at 50, thus allowing me to explore some “unconventional” ideas. Discovery, introspection and change is often neglected while raising a child. Although kids are delightfully consuming, most of the time there is little left to learn or care of animal suffering… That’s the animal’s curse, and the world in a nucleus, it moves so very fast.

That you were a vegan before a parent is fantastic! You’ve been able to work out a valid moral code before having a child. You will spare her much sorrow by teaching her consideration for animals now. What a wonderful sense of values she is being raised to embrace! I believe she will be “centered” and “whole”.

I am saddened though, when kids are born to parents that haven’t done the necessary personal growth or “inner child work” required to raise an emotionally healthy child. Many of these “bad parents” promote a “disconnect”… a seperation of animals from “meat”. Or a seperation of animals from “us”. I feel so badly for these children. If they are bright enough, some day they’ll make these horrible discoveries… and feel bitterly “betrayed”. I’m sure many of us can say the process is “draining”.

So, hooray for vegan parents raising vegan kids!!! Kids are the answer. The hopeful end to animal suffering, (and other world tragedies) will come from a future made of today’s vegan love and teachings. Raising focused, aware and compassionate kids… This is the part of the solution.

Ryan… A lovely daughter… a beautiful life – enjoy!

By: kitchenMage

kitchenMage — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 22:57:59 +0000

Ryan,

Another interesting post from you. (and then I spent too much time chasing links and reading at Josh’s and stuff. Shhh, don’t tell my editor!) It is nice to see someone thinking through how to handle teaching kids about tough topics. Now if we could just get someone to explain how to deal with kids who declare their veganness when their parents are not. Oh, wait…someone already did! (and I thank you for it!)

By: gladcow

gladcow — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 22:50:52 +0000

thank you, Ryan. I have had some pretty amazing conversations with my little vegans, it is heartbreaking sometimes. I want them to understand veganism and why it’s my choice, but sometimes those conversations get heavy fast and I worry about giving them too much information. But then there are the times when they make the connections themselves and they point them out to me (like Rasine did for you with the chickens). Nothing like those moments.

By: Marcy

Marcy — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 22:20:59 +0000

“I’m also constantly amazed (and inspired) when I hear about kids that aren’t even teenagers that decide to give up meat even when no one else in their family does. Often, these kids get their friends or families to go veg with them. That’s some realness right there.” Totally. I went vegetarian (real veg, no fish/seafood!) in 8th grade at the age of 13. I had tried to be full-time veg for some years before that, ever since I was little. My mom thought it would be a bad idea for several reasons, and we also were on a severe food budget. But in 8th grade I was big & stubborn enough to say “That’s okay, I won’t eat your food then, and yes I’ll go to bed hungry” when threatened with such. I stuck to my guns, and was able to be veg because of it. Needless to say this was not normal in either my family, friends or school. There were no veg options most places, incl. with lots of travel happening. But I used my stubborn side and found a way. And so, at a young age, I learned there is always a way to stick to your beliefs as long as you don’t waver and you get creative. Then after some research, I went vegan before my 16th birthday. I knew no one who was vegan, and no one around me knew what the hell to do with a vegan. There were years and years of education involved re: dealing with others and finding out more about vegan cuisine. When I lived abroad in veg-unfriendly cultures, again it was assumed being vegan would not be possible, but like my kid self, I was stubborn and got creative with finding vegan stuff. Many years passed, and now the same mom who said she wouldn’t cook one more thing for me if I gave anything else up (when i announced my veganism), now eats vegan 99% of the time and I gave her her own copy of Vegan Freak. And that is my happy ending :) (Oh, and I plan on being a vegan parent, adoptive no less, and so am always concerned people at the agencies will discriminate against me because of that.)

By: Lazurii

Lazurii — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 01:22:01 +0000

Thank you for the vegan parent insight. It’s very helpful to see what other vegan parents are doing. My own son is 9 months and will be raised vegan, and it’s nice to have a supportive net.

Now if everyone would stop commenting on when I’m having more/how many/why do you want that many?

By: vegeater

vegeater — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 04:00:43 +0000

good post. I too was surprised that josh’s post got so much heat.

I think one of the main things veg*nism has done for me is make me more aware of judgment, both from myself and others. When I am judged I feel alienated and unheard, and reluctant to engage. And I find myself tempted to judge others for the choices they make that differ from mine. But I can’t let myself do that; it’s not for me to be the arbiter of right and wrong; I can only control myself, what I do. I can perceive wrong and take steps to change it, but I can’t judge others for not seeing it.

So, I guess it’s the judgment that bothers me most–people judging other people for having or not having kids….isn’t that, in the scheme of things, totally off-point and counterproductive? Is compassion the opposite of judgment?

By: Tracy

Tracy — Sat, 06 Sep 2008 17:57:04 +0000

Excellent post! I don’t have kids and won’t be having any, but what you wrote makes perfect sense. I also think it’s good for vegans who have kids to write about them. I have a 3-year-old niece, and my sister, while she’s been reducing her consumption of meat, is against raising Reed as a veg*an because kids might tease her. So it’d be good to show her blogs of happy, well-adjusted, confident veg*an kids.

By: Davida

Davida — Sat, 06 Sep 2008 17:07:05 +0000

I’m also a vegan parent who is tired of the nasty anti-child comments. I have lost friends over this. I understand why many people choose not to have children. I respect that. I was in that boat for a long time. It should be a choice either way. Isn’t a lot of veganism about simple respect?
How did having a child suddenly make me less than vegan? It is just one more us vs. them division in a movement that loses cohesion more and more every day.

By: Nikki

Nikki — Sat, 06 Sep 2008 07:52:20 +0000

I don’t have children and it looks like I probably won’t be having any. Yet I was totally surprised when I read Josh’s post a while back because I had no idea that people were anti-children or that they would even consider such a thing. Perhaps it is maturity on my side since I am almost 40 but it would never even occur to me. I think it is beyond awesome to see vegetarian kids and parents and teenagers. It gives me so much hope. I wish I had been raised vegetarian and I think that these kids that are will have a super future free from the kind of suffering that many of us have gone through as the result of the standard American diet. Furthermore the fact that your 2 year old is able to express her innate compassion is basically the entire POINT of it all! You are raising an ethical vegetarian and she will have the best of everything. I love children and I love conscious parents. Keep on!